This is my story writing about a lighthouse that breaks down and creates a problem for the villagers on the clifftops.
'The moon looked like a crushed cookie in the dark sky. Then waves looked black so that you couldn't see people under the black waves. The boat was about to crash in to the pointy cliffs.'
I am a student at South Hornby Primary. This is a place where I will be able to share my learning with you. Please note....some work won't be edited - just my first drafts, so there may be some surface errors. I would love your feedback, comments, thoughts and ideas.
Wednesday, June 13, 2018
3 comments:
To support my learning I ask you to comment as follows:
1. Something positive - Begin with a greeting. Talk about something you like about what I have shared.
2. Thoughtful - A comment that will mean something to me to let me know you read/watched or listened to what I had to say. - use any language.
3. Something helpful - Give me some ideas for next time or ask me a question.
Encourage me to make another post
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Hi Oliver, i like how you add details something you need to work on is make some more sentences and it reminds me of the titanic.
ReplyDeleteHi
ReplyDeleteOliver Great discription of the moon
Grandma
hello
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